I’m at Seattle’s Best again. I should be studying for our Flash quiz tomorrow but eh, it’s cold and I’m thinking of too many things. I got hungry earlier (I really should stop eating just “rabbit food” a.k.a salad for lunch) and thought I can do thesis/study here, but in the end all I did was eat (it’s only Monday and I have P325 of my allowance left), read a little, go through some fashion blogs, and THINK. So now I’m cold, sleepy, and distracted by my own train of thoughts.
I suppose the fact that I’m strong-willed when it comes to dealing with friends but completely the opposite (extremely weak-willed) when coping with my own life, problems, and frustrations can be somewhat baffling. Sometimes, I think the reason why I want to be of so much help to all my friends is because I can’t fix or help myself. I’d like to believe I give good advice when other people ask for it but when my issues come to hit me in the face, I just cower or get hurt from it.
Think of happy thoughts: at least it seems some of my friends are slowly patching things up, or at least trying to see the bright(er) side. And while thesis is not exactly making me happy (at least for now, because all that it’s doing is dumping more worries and problems on my lap, and on the contrary it’s making my skin asthma start up again. Which is completely horrible because I’m itching all over), at least it’s the best distraction ever.
I keep forgetting I shouldn’t eat chocolates and chicken and seafood this week. Unfortunately, the first two on that list were the things I’ve eaten since I got to school. Good job, Camille.
When my brother and I were kids, back when we weren’t allowed to watch TV on weekdays, I’ve seen commercials of Ally McBeal on Studio 23. So yesterday, when I saw the DVD set in my aunt’s house, I borrowed it.
And had been watching Ally McBeal with my mom all day since.
Until I read that eventually Billy dies. Ever since the pilot episode, I’ve been hooked on the whole “One True Love” thing between Ally and Billy because they’re just so cute together (hello, smelling each other’s butts? Who can’t be sold on those two?). :( Heartbreak number one, Show.
After which I skipped to season 4, where Robert Downey Jr. becomes part of the cast as Larry Paul.
I’ve been signing up for premature heartbreaks and disappointments, I know. Heartbreak number two. :(
I really, really love RDJ’s character and it’s like the second worst thing (or the worst thing, since this is ROBERT DOWNEY JR. PEOPLE) since Billy died (well yeah, I know it was the unfortunate consequence of all his addictions back then but oh, don’t I just wish what if?). But still, I’d continue watching this for Downey Jr. At least he doesn’t die, but I know he’s never coming back. I can always imagine the series ended in some invisible, unfulfilled episode in which Ally follows him and they have a secret wedding. I’m such a shipper, haha.
On another note, I like Ally’s style. Whoever her stylist in the show is, he/she’s good. I like the simple but classy outfits. This show is dated, especially the first season, but I see her clothes and if I wore them today, I won’t look like I’m on period costumes.
Since my long-term memory is malfunctioning, I can’t remember when exactly Mother’s Day is. But I know it’s in May.
I love my mom; we’ve never gotten into a serious mother-daughter fight. Actually, despite my tendencies to lean towards rebellion, disobedience, and dishonesty, I’m still a pretty-obedient kid. Or maybe my mom and I just usually never have anything to fight about. I mean, sure, she’d get angry at me when I sulk or irritable, impatient, and disrespectful toward my dad but that’s the end of it. I’ve never shouted at her, we never had cold wars — nothing particularly violent.
Since I’ve been squandering my allowance money on big things (and by big I mean, EFFING HUGE. Some notable examples: the S$200-worth camera that got wet, which I replaced with a $600-worth camera; my MacBook Pro — 15″ and loving it; traveling to Phuket, Siem Reap, and Bintan.) I might as well use it up on something big and the best thing I can spend it on is on a gift for my mom.
I don’t know what to buy her yet. Easiest is a bag, but I’m not sure about the style she wants. I really want to buy her something extra-nice and extra-special and possibly extra-expensive so if I could maybe just afford a wallet or something within S$200 SGD (is that even possible!?), then I will. I wonder if that’s too materialistic? I want to get her something she could really love, and use! Plus I haven’t been able to celebrate with my family when she got promoted.
I’m going back to the Philippines on May 10 and I can’t wait! =) I miss my family and friends and I’ve missed out on too much (like people losing 40lbs like crazy, and possibly someone hooked up with someone again). I need to catch up on things (school-matters is something I dread though. One of them is a six-letter word that begins with a ‘T’ and ends with an ‘S.’
Lately I’ve started to consider other options for my future. Assuming I have one, well. I’m so insecure about my poor design skills; I think I’ve been left behind by even more talented people so in the possibility that I fail in trying to get into the design/creative/ad industry, I’ve decided that I could instead be:
1. A flight attendant. I got the idea when I saw this group of flight attendants eating and having a break at the airport (go figure). While smiling all day and dealing with some fussy passengers is no easy task with regard to taxing my people-skills, I think this will be a fun alternative for my future.
2. A cafe/restaurant owner. Design career or no design career, this is going to happen. I have too many plans going on for this to just leave them floating and lifeless inside my head. No, they will be out in the world to experience (once I learn how to start a business and maybe steal money for capital).
3. A traveler and part-time adventurer. This is assuming I will have won the lottery before embarking on this career in order to satisfy my tendencies for wanderlust.
4. A writer. Actually, the possibility of this happening is even less than the possibility of a career in advertising. I haven’t finished a single story and as much as I enjoy reading poetry, I’ve proven I’m not a poet since my attempts to write verse when I was seven.
5. A production designer. I’ve managed to dip my fingers in a few production-pies, so I know how much fun prod design is. However, I think this is a kind of job that will be more irregular than getting clients. Maybe. I don’t think I’d earn enough for #2 if I took this path either.
I don’t want to worry about so much yet because (1) I haven’t even started on my thesis yet, which is a requirement that will pave the way to my graduation and (2) I might just go back to being a student. Which has more benefits. But I need to get hired after graduation first.
Maybe I’m thinking too far ahead of things. :( Though, I want to think of life as something exciting as much as possible. I’ve popped enough happy-bubbles as it is.
Finally, our AdStrat presentation is done! We had our weakness but I think the prof liked our idea anyway. Which makes me excited because maybe advertising will actually be fun, if you’re working with the right people. My group mates are just awesome (except for one guy who was stupid enough to plagiarize his part from another group’s paper from the previous semester. Seriously, I don’t know how people like that can get into NUS, which is supposed to be in the top 10 unis in the world). Our group meeting last Sunday was actually fun (and funny). We went to the Shaw Towers for an extremely late lunch and ate at the Japanese/Korean restau there. On the way, my group mates ended up using “dubious” with all the “dubious looking” infrastructure and even ads, hahaha.
“That building just looks dubious,” “That guy looks dubious,” “The pink flowers hanging from the parking lot makes the parking lot dubious.” And even at the Japanese/Korean restau, with its unappealing brown tables and benches cramped together in a small space: “this looks dubious.”
Seriously, I’m so glad they have a sense of humor. We’ve exchanged some cuss words — I taught them “gago” and “putangina.” And I got this expression in Cantonese that meant something like ‘That shocked me!’ — “haseyang.” And Kailing always used “haseyang” haha, it’s so cute.
Ok, so anyway, this was the pseudo-stop-motion we made (the illustrations aren’t stop-motioned anymore because I didn’t have time to. Plus, it was hard using just iMovie and Photoshop CS4. I wanted to try making it in After Effects but I don’t have the program.) :(
And because their company website was made with ancient and outdated web standards (it’s really horrible, if you want to take a look), we redid their site. The process made me excited because of the possibilities I can do with the LFC website which terribly needs revamping also. I mean, logging in with your Facebook account? What else would the best way to get our members to utilize the homepage, huh? HUH??? THE POSSIBILITIES!
Now I really, really want to apply for an OJT in an advertising company to get the feel of what it is like being in the industry and to judge for myself if I want to go into it. I’m like a floating jellyfish in the middle of the ocean. I don’t know where exactly I want to go yet. Aside from (1) opening up this super awesome business idea with my friends, (2) traveling everywhere in the world, and (3) someday making my own film. But #1-3 needs an immense amount of money (or more like a fortune), and I need to find some way to earn that.
Seriously, I don’t feel so awesome at the age of twenty but maybe in ten more years I’d have something to be proud of. I still have this dream of someday being someone who can inspire people. :) And maybe being in a fantastic relationship with someone amazing, also. <3
…and bubble milk tea. I just had two glasses of that today. I think that’s enough for the whole week.
Bread is the easiest way of cutting down on money I spend for food. I just eat bread for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Then I eat some cookies I bought from time to time. Last week (until today) I’ve been having wholemeal bread. For tomorrow and the rest of the week, I bought butterscotch bread because HOPEFULLY IT WILL START TO TASTE DIFFERENT, and it smells so good (milk!). Yesterday I thought the bread tasted like meat. I don’t know if I was starting to get delusional. And that was just the second week.
I was able to eat three uhm, “normal” meals last week. One was laksa (which, when I asked Mimi and Shine-oppa if it were spicy they claimed it wasn’t but when I tasted it, IT WAS! But then they’re Thai and Korean so what’s spicy for them is definitely waaaay beyond what my taste buds can tolerate), the second one was my free merienda from Ambeth’s talk at SAM (pancit, buko pie, and palitaw), and the third one was actually a more western dish my cousin shared with me when we ate at IKEA.
And for those who know me, I usually don’t finish huge meals like that. No, not one whole bowl of noodles and fish and soup. Halfway through I already wanted to give up but I wasn’t with people that are used to sharing food with me. So I suffered a full stomach the whole night and didn’t sleep until around 2am. I dislike the feeling of a full stomach with much intensity. :(
That daim cake was just so, so yummy. It was the first time ever I got to eat that kind of cake. The milk chocolate was just perfect for me, and it wasn’t too sweet either. I shared the slice with my cousin (and well, we shared basically everything) and everything was just absolutely scrumptious. For someone who has been eating a bit of cheap food and bread, the IKEA food was like manna from heaven. I have no idea when I’ll be able to eat something like this again. HELLO STUDENT BUDGET. Haha.
Dammit. The pictures make me craaaaaave.
I will go back to IKEA (which has some nice things for my room, if ever I decide to buy some things from there) and Anchorpoint (clothes and shoes) for some shopping on some other day. Right now I’m just worried about my subjects/modules because I’m waiting for one to be approved :( and this is just too distracting for me. Which is bad. I have my philo paper from Ateneo and homework and studying to do for the two other approved modules I have here at NUS. And work. Work. Work.
I love dorm life. I love living alone. I don’t mind making mistakes with my laundry and then learning the second time around. I like talking with the other residents in our kitchen in the evening. I like going out with my cousin. I like exploring new places. I enjoy tasting new food. I enjoy meeting new people. But I also miss my friends. I miss having fun with them and going out with them. I miss hugging them and being hugged by them. I miss LFC, I miss being part of production groups and projects, I do miss my family (though living in the dorms still feel liberating), and I miss talking to my other friends. However, I don’t really miss Ateneo and their illogical ways of not letting me take subjects I want just because I’m not in Comm, and all their unreasonable rules I cannot understand. That’s going to be a huge motivation for me, and truth is I want to stay. I want to stay.
A part of me is still running away from an experience back home that I’d rather forget. A part of me wants the things I loved doing while I was in the Philippines. But a part of me wants to discover who I could be while I’m here and all the possibilities that could exist only from here. Four months is just too short.
The Singapore Art Museum (SAM) is the only place where you can get Ambeth Ocampo and buko pie at the same time. As sir Ambeth’s former student (I took Philippine/Rizal history under him last semester), I had been anticipating Ambeth Ocampo’s talk on Jose Rizal (and no, I didn’t realize they’ll be serving food–which eventually became my dinner–until the end of the lecture). I enjoyed his class, absorbed all his stories, and thrived in his humor. His lecture was familiar and yet even as I was listening to his anecdotes the second time, I still laughed at all of them. Ambeth is a professor I would not hesitate to take twice (given it’s a different subject I’m taking, not because I failed the first one). I’m lucky since apparently now sophomores take history in blocks instead of choosing their professors. I AM PROUD TO HAVE TAKEN HISTORY UNDER SIR AMBETH OCAMPO. He’s officially part of my favorite-teachers list. :D
Noel Cabangon also sang one song before the talk. There’s something that was just completely touching when I listen to him sing. He really is an artist who can move people.
I sat under it but unfortunately no flirting happened. :P
I’m starting to get used to getting lost since it seems like it will be a common factor in most of my trips to places I’ll be visiting for the first time. And I’m starting to like walking. My feet are even getting used to it. I’ve had some blisters last week but I’d have adapted to all this walking in no time!
SAM is only one of the many museums I plan on conquering! I should start making a weekly schedules of all the museums I plan on visiting (and re-visiting). :D
and there are many sheep here in Singapore! Not real sheep but it’s so hard to resist spending money when it concerns these cute, fluffy creatures that I never got over.
I just had to inflict a premature state of poverty buy buying that pillow. There was a cute top I wanted to buy but it cost $13 and I wanted to save so I didn’t buy it BUT WHEN I SAW THIS, ALL RATIONALITY I JUST THREW OUT THE WINDOW.
This was last Sunday, when we went to Golden Village to watch Sherlock Holmes (which was just awesome, btw. I want my own copy of that movie. I really loved the editing because they used jump-cuts, I think, in a way that doesn’t throw the viewer off. PLUS. HELLO. ROBERT DOWNEY JR. AND JUDE LAW. The women in the movie didn’t have lines that could have gone on par with Downey and Law, which made their characters less interesting, unfortunately.). I splurged on the sheep pillow (IT TRANSFORMS FROM THAT PICTURE I TOOK), a couple of postcards and a small pencil case (because it is always $2 at DAISO, I ended up…buying).
My cousin also treated me to mango sago! Their mango doesn’t taste like Philippine mangoes (which is still the best!). I thought it tasted like peach, haha.
There were many useless things I wanted to buy like this:
but it was ridiculously expensive and I had a student budget. SHEEP PILLOW WON, HANDS-DOWN.