Tag: antilamentation
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Cursed
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in PonderTwo relationships and I’m cursed with a bad fate of hating one of my partner’s closest friends. Being treated in a similar manner (and then some) like I was treated over ten years ago unfortunately is still unforgivable in my book. There’s some overlap in what they both did: being spurned, shrugged off, ignored, and…
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To meet is the beginning of parting
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in Ponder[逢うは別れの始め] To meet is the beginning of parting. The first time I read this, it felt like the perfect title of a story. It clues me in — prepares me for a bittersweet reality — and somehow I feel the words are beautiful as it does so. I know we will part, and I’m not…
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A brief look at 2014 and a late welcome to 2015
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in Live(After Victor published his blog post, I forced myself to finish writing this, too. Thanks Victor!! :P) This post is a bit late, but I feel that 2014 deserves a dedicated post to help me recount where I am in life now; what my previous goals were for the last year, and what I have…
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What loving life means
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in PonderThe past week I have struggled with some anger, hatred, frustrations at individuals, groups of people, circumstances, memories, whathaveyou. I haven’t been feeling affectionate or happy or understanding or patient. I just have moments when I’m just so dissatisfied no matter what I do and I forget that nothing will ever be perfect. I forgot…
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Broken hearts heal with distance
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in LiveI begin this post with a poem: The Changed Woman Louise Bogan The light flower leaves its little core Begun upon the waiting bough. Again she bears what she once bore And what she knew she re-learns now. The cracked glass fuses at a touch, The wound heals over, and is set In the whole…
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New Hair (and The Best and Worst of 2011)
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in LiveThis is going to be one of the (possibly many) pre-2012 posts (and the first) that I will be making before the year ends. This is also an attempt to use internet memes on my personal life, but I may get it wrong (which is why I’m just posting it here and not on 9Gag!) You…
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Almost the end of the year and there are feelings I cannot let go of
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in PonderI guess there will always be some things I’ll feel bad about, guilty over, but despite the wrongness of it — of clinging onto the strings of hate, I just can’t let go of these feelings. Not yet. I can’t because I don’t understand how anybody could be friends with him after everything he blamed on…
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You never really know anybody until you’ve seen the best and worst of them
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in PonderI used to be really insecure about myself because I felt that because we were both sort-of “creative” people, there’s this unsaid competition between us. And it’s a competition I don’t want to be in, which always made me want to give up an aspect of design to focus on something else. But hearing that…
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Design Hiatus
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in PonderFollowing a depressing night, I’ve decided to take a hiatus on designing. I honestly hate how I got here. I’m not over some heartbreaks, and that includes feeling useless and a lot of hate towards myself. My design portfolio used to be filled with posters and whatever I did in college, and it’s a phase…