You asked me out for our first date on the night of Angelica’s birthday dinner. I was crying from a confrontation with Chyna which happened just before I was going to leave with Angelica so I broke down in front of her and I ended up sobbing in her car. I can’t remember right now if it happened before we went to her house (so she can pick a dress) or on the way to the restaurant (I think it was before).

It happened in the car and I was still crying while telling Angelica everything (from the shoot to the kiss and to the I-don’t-really-know-what-to-do-but) when suddenly my phone beeped. I opened the message and shrieked (in pleasant surprise) and showed the text (you sent from Singapore) to Angelica and she said that made her giddy too. 

I think I wanted to go mostly because I was so sad about what Chyna thought and assumed like she’s never known me for two years. I was thinking, well there’s this boy asking me out and it’s probably not something serious but it’s not so bad to have some fun and cheer myself up.

I asked you if I should ask permission from your ex-girlfriend first but you said, no, let’s talk first. I was so easily swayed.

Maybe it was a selfish decision. It was the only thing stopping the tears from falling in the middle of Angelica’s birthday dinner and I was so depressed over my own “celebration”  from a few nights before plus the real birthday night that was tomorrow. I only wanted to be treated nicely, sweetly by a boy and that boy was you.