I’ve been frequently distracted these days (and nights). Sometimes I’m looking at houses for sale, checking out suburbs that we can call home. Sometimes I’m looking for venues and vendors, trying to plan a maybe–probably–likelyifwearelucky-2024 wedding. Sometimes I’m trying to decide what dress to wear, how big or small our guest list should be. The kicker? We’re still stuck in limbo, waiting for our PR application to be processed. 💀

So there’s a bit of a salad toss of thoughts on homes and weddings in my mind day to day, tangled strings of thoughts that I can’t action at all until we know how our PR application goes. I’m itching to set some things down on sand, if not stone, but I can’t.

Frankly, I’m excited. I genuinely want to celebrate with dear friends that’s been part of my life, old and new. I want to enjoy good food together while sharing the story of how and why Dylan and I are together. I’m happy thinking about having my family over and seeing old friends, introducing Dylan who I know they will all love. I don’t know when and where it will happen, but I do want it to happen.

I’ve got those days and also anxiety-inducing nights: what if we don’t get PR and then what? Some nights I’m coasting, reminding myself to just be patient and wait for news. And like with all things, the earth continues to revolve and I can’t pause time. Day by day I go through work and clients while trying to push homes, weddings at the back of my mind.

Maybe I should just be thankful that a busy brain is better than a bored one.