…and bubble milk tea. I just had two glasses of that today. I think that’s enough for the whole week. I don’t know how long I’ll last with just…bread.

Bread is the easiest way of cutting down on money I spend for food. I just eat bread for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Then I eat some cookies I bought from time to time. Last week (until today) I’ve been having wholemeal bread. For tomorrow and the rest of the week, I bought butterscotch bread because HOPEFULLY IT WILL START TO TASTE DIFFERENT, and it smells so good (milk!). Yesterday I thought the bread tasted like meat. I don’t know if I was starting to get delusional. And that was just the second week.

I was able to eat three uhm, “normal” meals last week. One was laksa (which, when I asked Mimi and Shine-oppa if it were spicy they claimed it wasn’t but when I tasted it, IT WAS! But then they’re Thai and Korean so what’s spicy for them is definitely waaaay beyond what my taste buds can tolerate), the second one was my free merienda from Ambeth’s talk at SAM (pancit, buko pie, and palitaw), and the third one was actually a more western dish my cousin shared with me when we ate at IKEA.

And for those who know me, I usually don’t finish huge meals like that. No, not one whole bowl of noodles and fish and soup. Halfway through I already wanted to give up but I wasn’t with people that are used to sharing food with me. So I suffered a full stomach the whole night and didn’t sleep until around 2am. I dislike the feeling of a full stomach with much intensity. :(

That daim cake was just so, so yummy. It was the first time ever I got to eat that kind of cake. The milk chocolate was just perfect for me, and it wasn’t too sweet either. I shared the slice with my cousin (and well, we shared basically everything) and everything was just absolutely scrumptious. For someone who has been eating a bit of cheap food and bread, the IKEA food was like manna from heaven. I have no idea when I’ll be able to eat something like this again. HELLO STUDENT BUDGET. Haha.

Dammit. The pictures make me craaaaaave.

I will go back to IKEA (which has some nice things for my room, if ever I decide to buy some things from there) and Anchorpoint (clothes and shoes) for some shopping on some other day. Right now I’m just worried about my subjects/modules because I’m waiting for one to be approved :( and this is just too distracting for me. Which is bad. I have my philo paper from Ateneo and homework and studying to do for the two other approved modules I have here at NUS. And work. Work. Work.

I love dorm life. I love living alone. I don’t mind making mistakes with my laundry and then learning the second time around. I like talking with the other residents in our kitchen in the evening. I like going out with my cousin. I like exploring new places. I enjoy tasting new food. I enjoy meeting new people. But I also miss my friends. I miss having fun with them and going out with them. I miss hugging them and being hugged by them. I miss LFC, I miss being part of production groups and projects, I do miss my family (though living in the dorms still feel liberating), and I miss talking to my other friends. However, I don’t really miss Ateneo and their illogical ways of not letting me take subjects I want just because I’m not in Comm, and all their unreasonable rules I cannot understand. That’s going to be a huge motivation for me, and truth is I want to stay. I want to stay.

A part of me is still running away from an experience back home that I’d rather forget. A part of me wants the things I loved doing while I was in the Philippines. But a part of me wants to discover who I could be while I’m here and all the possibilities that could exist only from here. Four months is just too short.