Tag: antilamentation
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You never really know anybody until you’ve seen the best and worst of them
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in PonderI used to be really insecure about myself because I felt that because we were both sort-of “creative” people, there’s this unsaid competition between us. And it’s a competition I don’t want to be in, which always made me want to give up an aspect of design to focus on something else. But hearing that
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Design Hiatus
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in PonderFollowing a depressing night, I’ve decided to take a hiatus on designing. I honestly hate how I got here. I’m not over some heartbreaks, and that includes feeling useless and a lot of hate towards myself. My design portfolio used to be filled with posters and whatever I did in college, and it’s a phase
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Let’s start from the very beginning
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in PonderI question everything I did, everything I was, everyone I knew. The past is too heartbreaking and I have nothing to be proud of anymore. Maybe I’m waiting to be whisked away by a job, classes, or learning. A tornado, a hurricane, a storm can take me to Oz and I’m not even sure I
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The blank stare
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in PonderTonight I dropped by C’s house with Gail to look for something. The first person I saw was Jopy. I no longer froze, nor felt my heart race in panic, and neither did I feel like a hunted rabbit. I just stared at him, then past him, before I realized I wasn’t at the brink
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It was never about deserving
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in PonderFor almost a year now I’ve struggled with the idea of being deserving of some things. Deserving goodness, deserving happiness, deserving love. Being blamed and getting called names by people whom I used to think of as, at the very least, “old friends” was the worst and most painful (and freshest) memory I have of college.
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So tired of feeling tired
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in LiveI’m tired. It’s already nearing the end of the month, and the last blog post I wrote was last October 8th. It’s not like I’ve been doing anything particularly overwhelming. I’m just perpetually trying to figure out things. Work-wise: Most of the day I’m either coding/designing for projects for the company or its clients, or
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And where the regret takes me
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in LiveGetting involved with a film org in college is the most bitter pill I’ve ever swallowed, the biggest mistake I’ve ever made, and the nastiest regret I’ve ever felt. I never knew, back in sophomore year, that saying “yes” to becoming Creative Deputy would lead me here. Here — regretting all those three years spent
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A type two
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in LiveI’ve taken the Enneagram quiz before, and I was a Type 2. That haven’t changed. I was reading up on it in another site and amazingly, it summed up my best and worst points: Generous, Demonstrative, People-Pleasing, and Possessive. When I said it summed up both my best and worst points, I can say for
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Reminiscing Singapore
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in LiveI just received from the mail a card my friend from Singapore sent over a month ago. Yes, Philippine post sucks but I’m just glad it didn’t get lost. I can’t believe it’s been a year since I arrived in Singapore, met new friends, and had one of the best experiences with so many wonderful